Jos76’s Blog

Thoughts and musings on life in a gay marriage.

Archive for March, 2008

Miami, You’ve Got Style

Posted by jos76 on March 31, 2008

Dac is a musician. As I mentioned in a previous post, he is a classical musician for the most part, but he also dabbles in more contemporary music. Everyone in our church looks forward to his musical contributions, be it a classical piece or a contemporary song. I have gotten very good at standing next him as people come up and compliment him afterward. I love it because I am always so proud of him. I have no musical talent at all so I am always impressed by what he accomplishes. I don’t mean to make it seem like it is effortless for him. It most certainly is not. Dac spends hours practicing at home and makes sure that everything that he performs in church or in a concert is excellent.

After seven years, I have begun to get a bit of the music bug from him. I can’t carry a tune to save my life and can’t tell if I am singing too high or too low. When I ask Dac if I should I sing a note higher or lower, he usually responds, “Can’t you hear it?” to which I respond, “Uh…no.”

There is one song that I can mostly sing in tune and of all things it is the Miami song that Rose and Dorothy sang on an episode of the Golden Girls. This is possibly the gayest thing that I have ever admitted to. For those of you that don’t have the “gay gene,” the Golden Girls was TV show in the 80’s about four women in the golden years of their lives (50-80 years old). I’m convinced that the innate ability to sing this song must be genetically linked to the gay gene. What else could possible explain it?

There are times when Dac and I are driving down the street and one of us bursts out with the lyrics to Miami and we sing the entire song together. Maybe there are some things that are different between a straight and gay marriage after all.

Enjoy Rose and Dorothy singing the original!

Jos76

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Posted in Faith, Fun | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

The Single Issue Voter

Posted by jos76 on March 26, 2008

I’ve been more invested and interested in politics during this election than I have every been. Maybe it is because I’m a bit older, or maybe it is more interesting. Dac and I often talk about what we want in a candidate (and eventually President) and we revisit who we support more each time we hear the Democratic candidates speak.

I initially thought that I would vote for the candidate who supported gay rights more, but in the past few years I have realized that I am not a single issue voter. It seems also that I am not alone on this. The Washington Blade recently reported on a Human Rights Campaign survey that reported that about 25 percent of the gay. lesbian, and bisexual voters that responded said that the economy and jobs are the most important issues. Another 24 percent said that health care was the most important and 18 percent put Iraq as their top concern. Others voters chose taxes and government spending or the environment and global warming as their biggest concern. Only 21 percent of respondents made gay rights/marriage their top issue.

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Unfortunately, the conservative right is not being as liberal in their voting issues of preference. NPR had an interview with Richard Land, who holds an influential position in the Southern Baptist Convention, which claims more than 16 million churchgoers. Land said that he is working to convince evangelicals that they should prioritize “the sanctity of human life (abortion) and … the sanctity of marriage” when voting.

That sounds like single issue voting for me and if that is the ideology of the socially conservative right-wing, I’ll just have to call myself a liberal.

Jos76

Posted in Politics, What's Ahead | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

What is this all about.com?

Posted by jos76 on March 22, 2008

ABOUT.COM

One way of getting the word out about a blog is to post messages and comments on forums and message-boards.  I have been doing this for several weeks.  Maybe you are here because you clicked on the link in one of my posts on a forum or message-board.  If that is the case, thanks for stopping by.

One of the places were I posted a comment was on about.com.  This is a gerat site with lots of information and expertise on specific topics.  Each topic is managed by an “expert” in the field (I think about.com calls them “guides”).  After posting a few times, I got an email from the Gay Life Guide, Ramone, asking me if he could write an article about me and Dac and promote the blog on the site.  He said that there are many readers who would be interested in reading about a real gay marriage in Massachusetts.

Ramone sent me some questions and asked for a picture.  A few days later we were on the welcome page of the site.  You can see it HERE.  I’m the one on the left.

Thank you for the over 2,000 visits to my blog in the past two months.  It inspires me to keep posting.

Jos76

Posted in Faith, Family, Friends, Fun | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Paris, je t’aime

Posted by jos76 on March 12, 2008

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During my sophomore and junior years in college I lived in France.  I originally intended to live in Paris and to attend one of the universities, but I realized after a few weeks that it was too expensive for an American student to live there, so I packed up and went to Rouen, in Normandy.  This was a much smaller city about an hour west of Paris. I enrolled in the University there and took a position as an English Teaching Assistant in a high school.

I lived in a little suburb of the city called Bois-Guilliame (William’s Woods) in a small apartment above the garage of a professor at the university.  We became great friends and had almost every meal together.  She was much older than me and had just divorced before I moved in.  She needed someone to talk to and I wanted to talk as much as possible in order to practice my Parisian French (I had a French-Canadian/Quebecois accent when I got there), so we were a perfect match.  It was kind of like a Harold and Maude situation, but the updated gay version.  Each night when we would set the table, there were the required elements like plates and utensils, but I learned to add a dictionary (which we would always seem to need) and Brigitte’s cigarettes (Marlboro Box), a lighter, and the ashtray.  It was France after all.

I am  a French teacher so I have been back to France many times since college, but it has always been with 20-40 students in tow.  I have enjoyed traveling with students, but student travel companies are not known for choosing the best hotels and restaurants.  This Friday, Dac and I are leaving for Paris.  It will be the first time since college that I have been without a group of students.  It will also be Dac’s first time there as well.  I’m very excited to show him around and experience this amazing city again.

Cheese, cafe, croissant, baguette, oh my!

Jos76

Posted in Friends, Fun, The Past, What's Ahead | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

We were moonstruck

Posted by jos76 on March 8, 2008

Meeting someone for the first time is sometimes difficult. Sometimes it’s easy. Back in November of 2000, after many emails and phone conversations that went on for hours (sometimes all night and had to end so we could go to work), Dac and I decided to meet for the first time. We had been talking for about two weeks and essentially knew everything there was to know about each other. We were not close by. Dac lived in Boston and I lived about one and a half hours away. Just the same, we talked a lot and agreed that we would meet up for the first time. The plan was for me to go into the city. I liked to do that, given that I lived on Cape Cod and it was November…the off-season.

We agreed to meet outside of a “T” (subway) station on Mass Ave (that’s local talk for Massachusetts Avenue). We had seen pictures of each other so we sort of know who we were looking for, but just to be safe we pulled out our gay genes (and jeans) and said, “I’ll be wearing a….” I drove into Boston, found a parking spot (I still don’t understand how!) and went to the Hynes Convention Center “T” station. Dac was there.

We had dinner at a small Greek restaurant nearby and then went back to Dac’s apartment to watch a movie. It was Moonstruck.

It was and is our favorite movie and we had quoted the entire movie to each other on the phone. When we got to the end of the movie, we both realized that we were experiencing something out-of-the-ordinary. “Will I ever find another guy who likes this movie so much, wants to be in a relationship, and is normal?” We had a brief conversation about whether or not we wanted to “be in a relationship with each other,” decided that we did, and have been together for over seven years since.

Dac will point out that I left out the part about the picture that I sent him. It was from my freshman year in college (I was 18) and we met when I was 24. I looked a little different (I had more hair in college). Honestly, it was the only picture I had.

Jos76

Posted in Fun, The Past | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

There are Liberals in Texas

Posted by jos76 on March 5, 2008

One of the reasons that I wanted to start this blog was to show people in other states (and perhaps even other countries around the world) that life in a legal gay marriage is nothing out of the ordinary. Sure we have to deal with politicians dismissing our relationship and contributions to our community and economy, but for the most part we lead lives that are not very different from our straight friends and family. It has been several years since gay couples were granted the right to legally marry in Massachusetts and you can ask anyone in this state..nothing has changed.

The great thing about the Internet is that you can easily reach people far away and close to home. If you read through some of the comments, you will see comments from a man in Saskatchewan, Canada (on the About page) and from a guy who lives in the same county where I live (Bandittalks). There are also comments from both my mom and Dac’s mom.

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One of the best and most surprising outcomes of these posts has been recognition from a blog in Texas called Texas Liberal. This blogger wrote about my blog so that other Liberals (and non-Liberals) in Texas could see how normal and respectful gay marriage can actually be. You can see his post HERE.

It’s great to connect with the world.

Jos76

Posted in Faith, Family, Friends, Politics, What's Ahead | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments »

If you really want to know..

Posted by jos76 on March 1, 2008

I stopped at Dac’s parent’s house last night on my way home from work.  Rock (Dac’s dad) has taken to calling me “blog guy” and always comments on my posts.  He had this to say about my previous post, Blue and Red Make Green:

“If you really want to know how your Republican friends feel about hot political topics, try this.  Get in a car with him/her and drive down the highway at 55 mph. ” 

(There is some planning involved and it requires the willing participation of a fox and at least 2 people-one Republican and one homosexual.  They can’t be the same person, so don’t try to save time and money by using a gay Republican, if you could even find one.  Stay with me..it will make sense.)

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“Once on a three-lane highway, drive down the middle.  Place the standing Republican in the right lane and the gay person in the left lane.  Just as the car approaches them, release a fox into the middle lane and see which way the Republican-friend-driver turns to avoid hitting the fox.”

“Then, once and for all, you will know if your friend is an animal-rights-activist.” (And find out where his/her loyalty stands.)

I don’t actually recommend doing this unless you really need to know if your friend is an animal-rights activist.  You gotta love Rock!

Jos76

Posted in Family, Friends, Fun, Politics | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments »